Wednesday, March 19

The Best Things I Know I Learned from my Kindergarten Daughter!


As I celebrate my 38th year birthday, I thought getting old in terms of age makes you wiser and give you more authority and influence over those who are younger than you -- especially over your very own kids. But in my case, our five-year old daughter Danya, had taught me more than I could ever think I would teach her. She has her own interesting little ways of doing things that always keeps me fascinated. There are a lot of instances that she amazes me with her big unexpected ‘sparkly’ thoughts. Other times, she would surprise me with her loud hulking voice chanting her own tune and lyrics. And of course, how can I forget her theatrical moments of crying after watching a very touching movie.  

Yes, I guess some of the best things I know in my entire 38 years,   I did not learn from books or from school or from anywhere else but from my daughter.  The following bits of thoughts that I will be sharing were taken from my old notes which captured some interesting talks and insights I had with my daughter Danya as she creatively journey through her five kindergarten years. Who knows these bits and pieces will also inspire an idea on how to transcribe one of your precious learnings with your little ones. Not only would it reinforce your bonding with your kids but would let you appreciate them more as incomparable individuals with their own brilliant minds and thoughts. 

    I don’t want to be Five!
Birthdays are always special for kids. Although during the first 2 years, it is usually us, parents who are so excited to plan of what party theme to do for our kids. I remember Danya had Barney theme for her first party just because she got hooked with Barney at that time and made us also realized “oh there is such interesting creature as Barney!” When she turned 2, Mickey Mouse was her favourite pal so we had Mickey and Friends as her theme party. She had fun memories during those two years but wasn’t really that remarkable because she didn’t really plan for it.

Then when her third year came, she decided to become a Princess! Yes, a Princess Party which she adored and had special memories of. She can perfectly recall I and her Daddy wore the Lady and Knight costumes, her Lolo Rolly was the King and all her friends were princes and princesses. Every time she watched the video she is filled with so much awe and excitement that she kept on repeating, “That was the best party ever!”

Oh, and what about four? There was an invasion of the Little Pony. She had her Little Pony party at the Café Ceramique with all her kindergarten classmates. That was an awesome day for Danya because that was a wish come true for her! She was all hands-on with her birthday plan, her cake design, and the type of pony dress she would wear on that day. She felt as if it was her first birthday project and she was the successful event planner.

Then here comes five! The party that she originally plan to be ‘a no birthday party’ at all. She decided that being Five is not good (because five year olds are naughty kids) so she would rather celebrate it with a simple family dinner at a hotel of her choice! She bargained rather than having a party, she will just have the full set of My Little Pony Equestria Girls as a gift. So we thought that was a good deal because this would cost us cheaper than throwing a party. But a week before her birthday came, she suddenly changed her mind!

And the rest was part of her birthday history! 

If you LOVE a person, marry her MANY times! 
When she was 3, I remember Danya started begging for his Daddy to ask my hand for marriage again simply because she was not able to witness our real wedding day. I don’t know, but it must be the influence of watching too much Barbie movies that she has associated true love and weddings. We tried to explain to her that we are already married and even showed to her our wedding videos and albums (which made her teary-eyed because she found it too romantic!) but the hard photo proof won’t just work for her. She still keeps on insisting if you really love a person, you can marry her many times so it’s okay for her Mom and Dad to marry again and again because that’s what true love is all about!

And you say…you are married for how many years now? Who’s the love expert here?

Let’s talk about Business!
When Danya was four, her favourite dinner topic was “What family business should we put up and how we should run it?”

She had too many things in her mind. There was an idea of having a candy factory, a lemon juice bar, a bakery, a pasta restaurant until finally she decided a buy and sell business would be best! When we asked her what did she meant by a ‘buy and sell’ business? She explained, well …we buy stuff that we need (meaning we go shopping of the things that we really need) and then gather all the stuff that we don’t need and put up a yard sale (perhaps, she meant a garage sale!).

 Hmmm… a new ‘buy and sell’ concept -who says kids don’t know about business!

God is not in Heaven, He’s in Your Heart.

When she prays at night, she always asks where is God and why can’t she see Him.  We always tell her, God is in heaven that’s why we can’t see him physically. But we can always feel Him especially every time we pray because prayer makes us closer to God. And we thought this is the simplest explanation we can ever give to make her understand God’s presence.

But one day she surprised me again with her query: “Do you really know where God is Mama?” Before I could utter a word, she whispered: I Know! I know HE’s here… God is here (pointing at her heart).

And that I think was the best answer I have ever heard!

Solve your Problem Not with your HEAD but with Your HEART.
Danya finds it boring when a person rest. She thinks sleeping or resting is the most boring thing in the world because you do nothing but close your eyes. So when she sees me about to relax, she will try to attack me again with her tricky questions just to keep me awake.

 “Mama, how do you solve a problem?”

 I was quite puzzled but then I gave my reply:  “it depends on what kind of problem you are solving, if it’s a math problem then you need to think and use your head.”  But suddenly she confidently cut me off and said: “No, mom, you don’t solve any problem with your HEAD, you solve all problems with your HEART, because GOD lives in your HEART and HE will be your guide in solving all your problems.”

Again, that makes sense!

Always COMPLIMENT your WIFE 
(especially when she’s pregnant)
I can say that my second pregnancy has never been easy from the start. Aside from the physical difficulty of having to work and travel long hours each day while carrying a big bump or watermelon in my tummy as Danya calls it, I’m having several moments of hormonal depressions that sometimes I just feel so sad and cry for no reason at all.  Good thing I have Danya on the rescue to ease things out if looking at her daddy makes my depression even awful.  But guess what my 5 year old daughter taught me on these occurrences: “Oh poor mama, I know you’re feeling sad now because Daddy doesn’t tell you  how pretty you are or you look very nice in your dress or even forget to call you on the phone every day to say “how’s the baby?” But… I do! I DO! I always love you and tell you are the most beautiful mom I’ve ever have! 

So tell me, who would not smile on this remarks?


These are just some of the many things I have learned and will keep on learning from my daughter. The list may add up until who knows I can complete a book someday.  The lesson her is, rather than searching for somebody or somewhere else for advises, just look beside you and listen to what your kids can teach you.  You would be amazed that they too, can be your very own personal life coaches.

Till then…


Monday, November 12

Lessons from Mister Stingy!

Every moment should be an opportunity to learn something new...yes, very true but hopefully not on the days when you are expecting to pamper and reward yourself with extra 'goodness'! Not on the days when you are ready to ignore the status quo for the sake of enjoyment. Not on the days when you just wanted to relax and free yourself from all worries. But that moment was unstoppable, the opportunity was so clear and was meant to take place.

It was an awkward yet a remarkable experience for me and Dennis in Singapore several months ago. Our supposed to be 10-day great Singapore experience turned into an unexpected miracle eye- opener for us. It wasn't the beautiful city or the awe-inspiring sites that made us remember Singapore. Ask us again about Singapore and we will untiringly tell you the lessons learned from Mister Stingy!

I call him Mister Stingy-- he is a full blooded Pinoy and lives in Singapore with his wife and daughter. He has been there working for nearly 10 years to support his family. His lovely wife stays at home taking care of their daughter who now goes to primary school. Mister Stingy doesn't rent a house, rather he owns an old but decent three-bedroom flat. It was sold to him by his previous landlord  by installment and currently pays reasonable monthly amortization to the bank. He has managed to lease the spare bedroom which now gives him additional source of income. He has also acquired properties in the Philippines and saved something for his early retirement. He doesn't really earn a lot ... just enough to take good care of his family. But he takes care of his finances very well, far better than any accountant (including myself!) can do.

So what's the magic key to Mister Stingy' s success story? LIVING SIMPLY! He lives a very simple yet contented life! A life of no waste, no excess,  no unnecessary add-ons! Just enough for everything. When he travels, he travels light. He always tries to fit things in one suitcase if possible. And it works well on him most of the time. The bottom line here, all of us can start  living responsibly by starting where we are now and what we currently have. No need to wait for a job promotion or a bigger salary to start saving for our future. If we want to be truly blessed, we just have to learn how to manage God's blessings responsibly and live LIFE simply.

If Mister Stingy made it, why cant we? Good luck to our new journey towards voluntary simplicity!


Tuesday, February 21

What Kind of Spice Are You?

Friends who really know me can easily say - "Chill cannot survive in her kitchen all by herself because she cannot really cook!" It's a shame but that's true! Cooking is not really my cup of tea. Rather than putting my apron on and dipping my hands on the sink, I think Dennis would prefer me calling our favorite restaurant for a quick food delivery. At least, we are all assured that we will not starve for the day. Good thing, we always have Kathy to save our hungry tummies.

But despite of my cooking deficiencies, I am not putting my hopes down. I have promised myself I will be learning how to cook the best way I can.In fact, I started my lesson last week with various spices and I would like to share some interesting thoughts on it.

Have you ever thought that spices are pretty much like us? Read below some of my favorites and decide for yourself:

Every kitchen has this - Black Pepper. It has a sharp, penetrating aroma and with a woody, piney flavor. It is hot and biting to the taste.

Cilantro has the "indescribable" bold flavor - it has a mixture of sage, parsley, and citrus that adds pungent flavor and sets apart many dishes.

Cinnamon (my personal favorite)is characterized as woody, musty, earthy, and sweet flavored spice. It is warming to the taste. Cinnamons can be whole, sticks, or ground and can be used in spiced vegetable dishes as well as in sweet baking dishes.

Paprika is the "garnish spice" that contributes brilliant color and sweet pepper flavor in light colored dishes. It is often used in French dressing and a popular addition to many rubs, marinades and sauces.

For no good reason,most of us can be like Mr Black Pepper - sharp and woody and hot tempered (and bite like a dog when being annoyed!).

Boldness that sets apart -now I can call this "cilantropic attitude". Looking at the positive side, cilantropic people can inspire us with their creativity and boldness in all their endeavors.

Speaking about Cinnamoners, I think everybody would want to be like them -- warm, good natured souls. They are down to earth and can hang out with people from all walks of life.

The Paprikans are people gifted with brilliance that can illuminate a gloomy atmosphere. Their mere presence can inspire and spice up one's life.

And of course, who can ever forget Mr.Salt? No further words required, but no cooking can survive without a pinch of salt.

So what about you? Have you thought what kind of spice are you?

Create a difference, spice up your life with love and goodness!

Tuesday, January 18

Life is Beautiful ...

Life is full of amazing surprises…Sometimes it makes you shiver and cry…Sometimes it brings you joy and laugh on high…Sometimes it says nice hellos …Sometimes it bids painful good-byes…Life is full of hopes and wondrous graces…Sometimes we see it, sometimes we don't…Sometimes we just sit and wait for our stars to come out…Sometimes we just close our eyes and let the day pass with a sigh…Sometimes we lift up everything on high and say let it be…But life goes on beyond laughters and tears, hopes and wishes…Life awaits hopeful beginnings to those who can truly accept painful endings …Life treasures long friendships to those who can endure agonizing distances…Life moves mountains to those who can struggle weak knees and fretful hearts…Life brings forth a beautiful journey to those who really believe and make life beautiful.


Everyone has his own creative way of starting a new year. I started mine dusting up and recollecting my old memory files. As far as I can remember, those memory trinkets I have kept were ten or fifteen years ago but it seems like the words and the memories are as fresh as those good old days. I should have created my own memory museum to capture and preserve all of these. Would you imagine our happy childhood days when love letters are finely written in sweet scented stationeries and cards are well crafted with beautiful words and sincerest feelings of love and friendship? And who can forget the smiley faces, the beautiful collection of scents and stickers, the secret pen names, the poetic words, and heart-warming flatteries? Ahhh…those were the days of great adventures…carefree moments of creating dreams and wishes…and literally, an era of simplicity and hopefulness.

Yes, sometimes it’s good to think of happy memories when you are bombarded with uncontrollable spills of life. It clears your perspective and somehow, makes you feel not all days are bad and this one will soon pass. Perhaps, some of us went through days of faltering faith, tormenting nights of tears and worries, and unending race to nowhere. I did, and I still do from time to time. There are times, when I just don’t know how to pray and say thank you. There are times, when I get so impatient and too confident to do things on my own. There are times, when I expect too much and ended up so distressed with my expectations. There are times when my own race of life becomes meaningless and exhausting. But despite these low tide moments of my life, I realized, life is, and can always be beautiful if I choose it to become beautiful.

Would you believe, there is always beauty in every detail of our ordinary existence? There is beauty in the failure of our dreams…it motivates us to get up and learn and start again building new dreams. There is beauty in the parting of lives…it brings us to another beginning and a time to begin a fresh new life. There is beauty in being heart broken…it restores our hearts and makes our soul strong after the wound has healed. There is beauty in not having enough money…it makes us contented in living a simple life. There is beauty in patiently waiting for our destiny… it makes us realize even if the waiting takes a lifetime, everything will be worth the wait. There is beauty in being restless…it makes you cling to a great God and yearns for his protective embrace.

Indeed, there is beauty in love and pain…in high tides and low tides… in success and failures…in joy and sadness…in hellos and goodbyes…in certainty and ambiguity…in life and death. And remember, life can always be beautiful if you make it so.

Thursday, December 16

Because She Is A Mother….

This is a tribute to my wonderful Nanay, and to all those brave women who would be soon become mothers.

Because she is a mother…
She watches over you when you go to sleep
She wakes up every time you open your eyes
She worries when you shed out tears and cry so hard
She laughs when you show her your first tricks
She dances with joy when you call her ‘mommy’

Because she is a mother…
She senses the touch of your hands
She feels the silence of your pain
She knows the surprises of your life
She dreams the sky of your happiness
She embraces the whole of your being

Because she is a mother…
She wishes… you embrace her so close in your heart
She yearns… you shower her with everyday kisses
She prays… you appreciate her uncomplaining love
She hopes…you make the very best out of your life
She dreams…you fly high yet have your feet on the ground

Because she is a mother…
She endures…she suffers…she forgives.

Because she is a mother…
She cares…she trusts…she loves with all her heart and soul.

Tuesday, June 15

Your Sunniest Day!


The sunniest day should be yours today
Because the sky is clear and the clouds are happy

The sunniest day should be yours today
Because the birds are singing and the sea is breezy

The sunniest day should be yours today
Because the flowers are blooming and the butterflies are busy

The sunniest day should be yours today
Because your world is blessed and your smiles are plenty

The sunniest day should be yours today
Because I found you and that make you lucky.

The sunniest day should be yours today
Because my heart says I love you and that extends to infinity.

Land of Haste...

I was browsing my old files, and i found this piece...i wrote this when i was just starting my new life in this new place. I didn't know the "Land of Haste" i used to call, would be my new found home. I'm glad not only I've come to learn the rules in this land, but also I've learn to found love in this place.

Land of Haste...

I was only here in this new place for a week but it seems like I was cruising an eternity of haste. “Culture shock” may be a strong term to describe what I was undergoing, but somehow some events caught me unprepared, which undeniably gave a “little shock on my nerves.” This kind of ‘rush life’ is never new for most people here. But if you are a “fragile soul” and are used to a serene, organized way of living, then you will be like “a hermit being deprived of your seclusion and thrown in the middle of the noisy and crowded world.”

But there’s nothing wrong about living a “rush life”. In fact, it amazed me to see how these people could thrive in this defiled, busy, and crowded environment. Or how these people--young and old alike--run after buses as they commute everyday and cross the speedy express ways and skyways. Or how these people endure outrageous traffic jams everywhere on the streets and tolerate the smokes and gases emitted on air. Or how these people ordinarily anticipate floods when it rains. Or how these people amazingly survive in this “land of haste.”

There are actually a lot of things in here that I, and probably, some of you out there, would not dare doing or would not bear undergoing! Surviving is never easy in this land of haste, much more, to survive with every piece of your heart, mind and soul still intact. Probably reason why, toughness rather than tenderness sparks from these people. Everything ,whether how tough it is, they do just to survive gracefully in this land of haste.

But despite of its negative side, it is still exhilarating to know a world like this exists. I knew it does but I never actually realize it would be like this. Certainly things didn’t happen overnight for these people. They must have undergone tough moments as well as long and arduous adjustment period before they finally set their nerves in place.

Finally, here’s another lesson I got in here:

“Life is a battlefield and every man is a soldier. If you are weak, you die, if you are strong, you survive. And the strong should command, should lead, should dominate.”

Hopefully, I’ll soon learn the rules in this land of haste.